Welcome to 2010

My room is completely silent other than the sound of Peter and Ziggy shuffling around in their cage. I need music.

OK GOT MUSIC.

2009 was pretty lame for me.

Isaac and I didn't see each other the WHOLE ENTIRE YEAR. I mean in person, of course. We still saw each other a bunch on Skype. My whole year seemed to be a waste. There is so much I would like to do but rather do it with Isaac so I didn't really bother doing much at all. I have just been WAITING for 2010 to come. I hardly even saw any friends this year. It has been pretty lonely for me.
Loneliness just leaves me to think about everything and that begins to really stress me out.
I am wondering if all that has anything to do with the fact that I have a bunch of grey hairs that started growing in the beginning of the year. I didn't have any that I knew of in 2008!

2010 just looks nice and friendly and all I can look forward to is awesome stuff now. Isaac gets here in March (!!!!!!!) and we marry in May (!!) then I can finally stop spending so much time waiting for life to start and actually get to it.

Ob-la-di ob-la-da life goes on...

I will try to be less whiny this year.
Ok, additions to my new years wish list:

• Be less whiny in 2010.
• Get clothes I actually like and will wear and get rid of all the stuff I don't even like.
  
• Get more girlish clothes, like dresses. WEAR THEM. Stop settling for tshirts and jeans just because it's all I can find.
  
• Stop buying fabric until I use at least 1/2 of what I already have.

New years

I never make resolutions but maybe I'll just make a list of things I would LIKE to do in 2010. Yes.

• Really teach myself how to sew, then sew lots of stuff.
• Try to stay stress-free around our wedding date. I always told myself I wouldn't turn into Bridezilla, if something goes wrong then it's ok. Just as long as Isaac is there, I am there, and we get married. :)
• Organize my closet and the closet in the office.
• Get rid of craft items and fabric I always think I will use but never do. (Craigslist?)
• Wake up at extremely early and view the sunrise from a place with a nice view.
• Limit my Human Bean coffee spending. >_<
• Make more stuff and sell on Etsy again. Better stuff.
• Move out.
  
• Plan a reasonable budget that I can actually stick to.
• Make a video I can actually say I like.
• Find a job I'm actually happy with and earn more than minimum wage.
  
• Take on Yoga again.
• Get or make a thread spool holder. Whatever they are called.
• Go camping with Isaac.
• Hike Table Rock for the first time.
• Blog more.
  

That's all I can think of off the top of my head at the moment. I will probably periodically post updates on my list.

Not an update.

I just felt like doing it. Got a problem?

Put your iTunes on shuffle. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
IF SOMEONE SAYS ‘ARE YOU OKAY’ YOU SAY?
When I'm Sixty-Four - The Beatles

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
Chant Of The Ever Circling Skeletal Family - David Bowie

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Walk on the Wild Side - Lou Reed

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Shapes of Things - Bowie

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
Me by the Sea - Edie Brickell

WHAT’S YOUR MOTTO?
Eight Line Poem - Bowie

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Let It Be - Beatles

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
The Wedding Song - David Bowie

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Neighborhood #3 (Power Out) - Arcade Fire

WHAT IS 2 + 2?
You Learn - Alanis Morissette

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Telling Lies - Bowie

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
One After 909 - Beatles

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Hand of Doom - Black Sabbath

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
TVC 15 - Bowie

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Dead Finks Don't Talk - Brian Eno

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Lady Stardust - Bowie

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST
Word on a Wing - Bowie

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
Dancing Machine - Jackson 5

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
I'm Finding It Harder to be a Gentleman - White Stripes

WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
A New Career in a New Town - Bowie

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Blow the House Down - Siouxie and the Banshees

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Some of those came out kind of interesting to me. I might do another. Get over it loserface. Haha.

Holidays are exhausting

It's great how working in retail really sucks every drop of fun out of the holidays. It's just so hectic and crazy and every one is just way too into all the material things for christmas and even thanksgiving. Can someone please track down the genius behind Black Friday? Oh. My. God.
It's like, "Here, have a day off for Thanksgiving just so you can worry about having to wake up at unreasonable hours the next morning and work your ass off for a bunch of greedy people!"
I'm just so excited, as you can tell.
I have yet to work Black Friday at my current place of employment but I hear about it a lot. There are people who say they stood in line for almost an hour and a half. Why? For some insane roller coaster or an awesome concert? NO! For some flannel and yarn! ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Sales are great but COME ON.
Plus, many people seem to act as though these purchases are an emergency and they desperately NEED them. Really now. Calm the f down and get your priorities straight. I can't wait to see how bitchy they will act when THEY decide to go shopping before the sun comes up and THEY decided to wait in the line for something so unimportant. I just can't wait until after christmas is over. Things will go back to normal and there will be a lower amount of wolves out. Plus maybe I could have a chance to breathe.

Then our skin gets thicker from living out in the snow...

I'm trying to get the basic planning for our wedding out of the way so I won't have to worry about it later.
Things are going alright, kind of, but I've hit a bit of a road bump.
I forgot that many people in my family would have a problem with a secular wedding.
We aren't going to have a wedding that doesn't represent us, but at the same time I am so scared.
There are a couple family members that can't quite keep their mouths shut at ANY wedding and always cause problems. But uh oh, have a wedding without a mention of god in the ceremony and we may have a problem.
I mean, if they felt the need to pray for us or something, they could go ahead. But it will be OUR wedding day and if they have the nerve to make a problem during it then that would just be really immature.
Maybe they won't think that it's a real marriage. Well unfortunately for them, it is a real marriage regardless of whether there's a pastor or a judge holding it.
I may be jumping ahead in judging how people may react but I feel the need to prepare for it so it doesn't catch me off guard. I had a problem just now with my mom saying it's a shame we aren't having a christian ceremony. Sorry to disappoint you.
I either have a choice of disappointing them or having a ceremony that neither of us want.

WAAHHHHH

Welcome to November....

Hello world.
I never finished Vlogtober. I was doing so well and then one day I worked all day and completely forgot. The next day, I made a video that basically just said I forgot to make a video the day before but this video was so lame I didn't feel the need to post it. After that, it all left my mind. I didn't even want to bother with Vlogtober anymore. I already had a stressful month, I didn't need to add to it! Editing from that camera takes ages because the file type isn't accepted by my normal editor. So what I have to do is put all the clips together on the editor that COMES with the camera and then save that as a proper file and THEN edit AGAIN on my editor. Why? Because the editor that comes with the camera automatically fades all the clips together and I HATE that. So I just cut out all the fades later on. I know it's a lot of work but I really don't like fading between clips!

I did want to make a halloween video though. That turned out GREAT! Not.
The day before halloween, I quickly began coughing and feeling achy and weak. I left work early because of my fear of what I may have had plus I was finding it impossible to work under those conditions. I ended up packing a few items and hauling my ass to my parents house so mommy could take care of me.. haha.
Yesterday (Halloween) was so shitty. I wanted so badly to have fun but I could hardly even stand or sit up for more than a couple minutes. Of course I couldn't do anything fun! My throat was beginning to get really sore at this point as well.
And then today I also couldn't go to work. I hate this, missing more than one day of work. No matter how sick I am, I feel horrible calling in. Especially since I have no idea how long this is going to go on. At the same time, I know I shouldn't have any reason to feel bad for calling in. I AM really sick and there is no way I could work like this. No one would be happy.

Today started out horribly. Swallowing would bring tears to my eyes with all the pain and I often found myself not being able to speak which really frustrated me. Around 4 PM, I almost magically felt a lot better. Well, I am still coughing painfully and feel weak and tired but my throat is about 88% back to normal. I'm going back to the apartment tonight so that if I wake up feeling well enough, I can go to work easier. I realized I didn't do a good job packing to come here, I have nothing.

Kthnx.

Vlogtober killed my blog.

Since I'm doing Vlogtober, it feels a bit repetitive to do my blog as well.

Well something I don't think I've mentioned is that Isaac received the notarized letter of intent I sent him and so someone is going to drop by and pick it up from him soon. After it's picked up, he'll soon get the visa. :) That means we will then make the official wedding date. We are thinking May now. April at the earliest. I know the wedding date is one of the first things people plan when engaged but we really couldn't because we didn't have a clue how long this process would take. We didn't want to make a date and then have to change it a bunch!

I've felt so busy this month. Even on my days off I feel as though I have a bunch to do and like I have no right relaxing. When I do sit around for a moment, I feel as though I NEED to be getting something done but I'm not always sure what that something is.

I'm pretty much done with my halloween costume. I need to make a belt and Bowie Chick will be done. Whenever I have a chance next, I need to make a tutu for Celsie's daughter. I already got the stuff to make it with but I just need to go to my parents and do it.

Work has been hectic. A fabric and craft store around halloween and in preperation for Christmas is just pure chaos. I hardly have time to breathe when I'm there. A while back, a really rude customer came in. She has been in quite a few times before. I deal with rude bitches a lot but some reason, I couldn't quite take this one. She made me cry right in front of other customers and I was stuck at the register all teary eyed until someone could finally cover me. My manager is really sweet and gave me a chance to get over it before getting back to work and kept complimenting how well I took care of her. Even though I broke down like a baby, I guess the fact that I didn't treat her the way she was treating me is good. I could have easily just told her to shut up and let me fix my mistake. Lesson for her: Don't go shopping in a store that you KNOW is always busy when you are in a huge hurry to something and are incredibly impatient and have a shitty life. One funny thing is that she DID special order something from us so I could easily track down her name and address. :) Be careful how you treat the people that are serving you ANYTHING, not just food. :)

I also got a new phone this month which is nice. My old one was from the beginning of 2007 and it was starting to do weird stuff. I figured it was time for an upgrade. Since I text more than anything, it's nice having a full keyboard.

Better go get ready for bed. I work way too early in the morning and I'm definitely not looking forward to it. Bleh!