Welcome to 2010

My room is completely silent other than the sound of Peter and Ziggy shuffling around in their cage. I need music.

OK GOT MUSIC.

2009 was pretty lame for me.

Isaac and I didn't see each other the WHOLE ENTIRE YEAR. I mean in person, of course. We still saw each other a bunch on Skype. My whole year seemed to be a waste. There is so much I would like to do but rather do it with Isaac so I didn't really bother doing much at all. I have just been WAITING for 2010 to come. I hardly even saw any friends this year. It has been pretty lonely for me.
Loneliness just leaves me to think about everything and that begins to really stress me out.
I am wondering if all that has anything to do with the fact that I have a bunch of grey hairs that started growing in the beginning of the year. I didn't have any that I knew of in 2008!

2010 just looks nice and friendly and all I can look forward to is awesome stuff now. Isaac gets here in March (!!!!!!!) and we marry in May (!!) then I can finally stop spending so much time waiting for life to start and actually get to it.

Ob-la-di ob-la-da life goes on...

I will try to be less whiny this year.
Ok, additions to my new years wish list:

• Be less whiny in 2010.
• Get clothes I actually like and will wear and get rid of all the stuff I don't even like.
  
• Get more girlish clothes, like dresses. WEAR THEM. Stop settling for tshirts and jeans just because it's all I can find.
  
• Stop buying fabric until I use at least 1/2 of what I already have.

Play that funky music white boy..

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii there readers. Wow, I really dragged that one on.
I just woke up, if that makes any difference. I don't work today which is wonderful but I always spend the first half (if not all) of my days off of work being very slow and lazy.
Yesterday at work was one of those "this is the day that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends!..." kind of days. Oh man, I felt like going to the back room and hiding there a couple times. It just wasn't fun at all. Me and the other lady at the cutting counter almost didn't get to go on our breaks because we kept asking over and over for someone to come and help at the cutting counter so that one of us could go but no one would EVER respond. Not even to say, "Sorry, we're all busy!" They WOULD respond if we asked them any other question though meaning they COULD HEAR US. Made me angry. We eventually went on our breaks way after they were supposed to be when another lady arrived to work. Thank you.

So what has happened since my last update?
Oh!

On September 16th, Isaac had his visa interview at the US Embassy in London. All went well except for one thing that I didn't do. I didn't get a paper notarized. I'll do that today when I bring my check into the bank. SO when I send that to him and then he sends it along with his passport to the embassy, he will then have the visa! Next step in this process would be for him to pack his stuff that he's sending over here and finding the best/cheapest way to send it all.

On the 18th, Lindsay invited me to see a band her co-worker's in called "Funkamungus". It was at Stillwater in Ashland which is a small dark bar that took ages to find. We were looking for some sort of sign but never saw one. Instead, we just saw the address painted on the side. I wasn't really expecting much, to be honest. When we arrived at around 8 (when the doors opened) and the show was to start at 9. At first we just looked in only to see a couple people so we went on a little walk and then came back. When we came back, there was slightly more people so we went in and waited. During the wait, the crowd grew. Finally at about 9:15 or so, they started.
At first I just felt awkward there... as I do anywhere. We kept trying to find a place in the growing crowd to view from but we were always ending up by the water cooler, the back room door, etc. Just constantly having to move out of the way for people. Just way too small in there for all those people!
We then left to Albertsons to get out for a moment and when we came back in it was like a wall of heat hit us when we walked in. It felt as though you can't breathe!
After they had a little break and they opened some doors for air, we moved to a better location. There's where we actually got into it and I had a blast dancing to the funky music! Oh man, why aren't there more funk bands? Seriously, I had so much fun and everyone there was enjoying it as much as I was. Everyone was a dancing fool, seriously. I didn't care that I was in a big group of strangers (ahh social problemsssssss!) and it was super hot in there. We left at midnight because Lindsay had to get home so we didn't get to see the whole thing.
Ok that was my experience but what about the band? Were they actually any good?
YES! The band website had their bios which need to be updated because there are a couple people that are different. They had a trumpet player which isn't on there and a different singer. They really got into the music and looked like they were having a party on stage as well just dancing and laughing. They were really entertaining for me.
I do like funk music but since I've never heard anyone play it live, I didn't know I like it as much as I do.
So thank you, Funkamungus.

There are pictures on their website from that night. Unfortunately, you can't hear the music or feel the vibe of the crowd in them. You can't even really tell how much everyone was dancing! So thank you, Lindsay, for inviting me.

On the 21st we had a bunch of fires in our area which was scary.

Other than that, I haven't had much going on.

I'm a bitch

I miss painting and crafty stuff. I really do have the time for it but I normally just end up getting out of the house because I don't feel like wasting summer any more than I already am. That's probably why so many more people do those things (and sew) in the winter. You're trapped inside anyway so why not?
The clean up process after making the mess is also a bummer. I can't help but think about how much of a pain it is to clean out paint brushes and all of that stuff when I'm done and I don't even want to make the mess anymore. Where can I get a free maid that will do all this for me? Meh.
In that sense, I am excited for fall and winter. At the same time I feel as though I haven't had much of a summer. It's not as though I ever really did any of my life. I've always been a nerd that just hid away waiting for summer to end. The main reason is because I had/have hyperhidrosis which is completely embarrassing and in summer I couldn't hide it with a jacket. Fortunately, that's not something I have to deal with as much anymore but it took years to mentally recover from the humiliation and problems it caused.
Still, I don't have many friends (only 2 I've seen in MONTHS) and it's pretty hard having fun when you're alone. I just wish I could have a fun summery summer for once and not regret wasting it all away being a loser. !97297927 (*@&982729 (*&2 298eoiywhdjkc

It's getting harder and harder for me to work at the type of job I have. The idea of me doing it for a few more years or my whole life kills me. It's not the co-workers, I just have a really really REALLY hard time dealing with customers. I complain about them often enough on here. Just sitting here, I feel like screaming or crying thinking about how much a pain so many of them seem to be. It might actually just be a few but they really stick out in my head and I automatically just view all customers as this way. I am sick of the ones that treat me like crap and assume I make the rules of the store I work at. NEWS FLASH: I don't! I am also not the one that supplies the store with merchandise so I have NOTHING TO DO WITH THE FACT THAT WHAT YOU WANT IS GONE OR DOESN'T EXIST!
It's also getting harder for me to keep my cool with them. I used to be able to smile or treat them nicely until they left but this anger bottled up in me and I used to cry after work... a lot. Now, if a customer is so rude to me that I can't handle it, I don't bother being nice. It's not as though I yell at them or call them anything rude to their face, I just give them a cold shoulder. This isn't professional but they should learn to treat people better. It's a good thing I don't serve food, I'm sure you could imagine what I'd do with that. :)




It's always the quiet ones you have to look out for.

Tired, but still sober

I am tired and can't wait for a day or two or four off. ;)
Even with short shifts, it still messes with my days. Waking up earlier or whatever, having to make plans around it, and then thinking about my next day at work.
I really can't complain, it's a job. Plus, I begged for this job back. Well, not really. I just went in and said "HEY!" and got it back. Not exactly like that but it may as well have been. Still, I appreciate my job but I can never get used to CUSTOMERS. You, customers, are the reason it's hard to go to work. You, customers, are the reason I want to hide in a corner and wimper.
Don't worry, I know that most customers are just human but those few/hundred that come in daily and don't have anything better to do than make me feel like shit are really making me bitter about ALL customers. Sorry about that, I don't hate you all. :)
Anyone in any kind of customer service job can probably relate. Oh the horror. Oh the minimum wage. Oh.
So I'm 21 now. Not much exciting about that. I don't drink and haven't drank anything yet. No, seriously. Ever. In my life. Haven't had alcohol. Never felt the need or anything and never set myself in an environment where people were drinking. Plus, I kind of liked knowing that I am/was a rare breed - under aged people that didn't drink alcohol. Even when I checked "No" next to "drinks alcohol" on a questionnaire at the doctor's office, the doctor assumed I just didn't want to say yes and get in trouble for being under 21. Psh, my answer IS no.
Now, that's not to say that I thought everyone that drank as a teenager is inferior or stupid. I just didn't feel like I needed to. Though I must say that I will never understand people who only seem to hang out with friends if they are drinking. I see it on MySpace on the time. It seems like people only have pictures of themselves at partys with a drink in their hands acting careless. I even remember this in high school.
But now that that has been said, I will most likely drink some time soon. I mean, I'm 21. I've reached my "goal". I remember when I was a child and told myself I wouldn't drink until I was old enough. It's not as though I had to consiously remind myself all the time of this or that I felt pressured by society to. It stuck with me, that's all. We will see how this goes. >_<
And now, I shall go. I'm so bloody tired. I have no idea why I'm even up or why I typed a blog when I rather be in bed. I have been tired since I woke up early this morning! Crazy Melody.

2009 Sucks

When Isaac was leaving America at the end of October 2008, I already knew that 2009 was going to suck. At that time, I actually thought we'd be able to see each other at least once or twice this year but that still didn't seem like enough.
That has changed. In the beginning of this year we came to the realization that we can't see each other AT ALL (in person) this year. It would cost too much and we need the money for his moving here and our marriage and everything. And immigration is stressful and hard to deal with. If a couple wasn't strong enough, this process would really split them apart I'm sure. We're doing well though, we have to work together.
So if that's not sucky enough...
People keep dying all over. Not just celebs, mind you. Neighbor, grandpa, people. Not people I'm necessarily that close to but still more than I'm used to. Ziggy got horribly sick and that was scary. Now my dog Daisy is really hurt in her rib area. She can't roll over or lay on her side and we can't pick her up without her crying.
Plus my mom getting that twisted ovary and going to the hospital for a while with a while of thinking it could be an cancerous cyst.
And while we are trying to pay that off, I had to go to the doctor for something that I won't even talk about. More money. Keep having to have my blood drawn. Even MORE money. And now taking hormone pills because I'm a man... EVEN MORE MONEY. It's hard to stay calm about this stuff when you also have to think about the fact that it's bloody expensive!
Plus, Jon and Kate separating and all that shit. Seriously, that bothers me. I am officially on Kate's side of things. Jon needs to grow up.
That kind of lined up with my friend Celsie and her ex. They have a wonderful daughter and were going to get married back in like May or something. Well, they broke up. They are still friends and he isn't abandoning their daughter, he takes her every other week. It's just sad.

I might just be focusing too much on the bad and not on the good but seriously, I am not liking this year. I can't wait until 2010 because I feel that will be a good one.

In other news, my 21st birthday is on the 7th of August which is a week and a day ahead. Too bad I work that day, and all the days around it.

Blog suggestion

Blog suggestion:
The Weekly Menu
My friend Jen has created a new blog where she posts a week long menu along with a shopping list for that week. If you're like me, it's hard to think of what to make and going to a recipe site hardly helps because there are too many choices!
She's my friend so that should be reason enough to promote her blog. Check it out!

Steel on the skyline

I'm in the mood to listen to Bowie's "Heathen" album. The sound of that album kind of reflects my mood today...
Anyways....

I have a website about Isaac and myself that I will be now using to update where we are with our marriage progress. If you want to check it out, go here.

I had someone complaining that all I talk about now is either money or Isaac. Get over it, I talk about some things that are going on in my life and this is where my life is right now. I currently don't have that carefree feeling. Bye!
Don't mistake this for being unhappy. I'm happy, just a little stressed. The internet helps me stay sane because on here there are people that can relate to our situation but it seems as though everyone around me in real life never had to deal with anything like this. Long distance relationships, fiance visas, anything like that. Isaac and I will get through this, I can feel it.

And honestly, there isn't much else going on right now. I hardly see Lindsay, Jennifer and Johnathan moved to Idaho, almost never see Celsie, and as for other friends? Not many others. Amanda's in New Mexico, Megan and I never contact each other (sad). And plus I hardly ever go places anymore because everything costs money. Money that I can't spend. So I feel very restricted right now. Home, internet, Isaac, work. My life as of now.

I have nothing to talk about. Bye!

Christmas cookies!

Here are the pictures I said I'd post... click for larger image.

I have no idea why we are hunching over like that. Lindsay and I were doing weird dance moves, I believe. Like our aprons?


Jen and Lindsay talking about whatever. I was already done decorating mine while they were still going at it!


We had hot chocolate with marshmallows AND whipped cream. We also listened to christmas music. Oh the fun never stops!


Messy.


Jen's cookies. She made a 3d frog!! And that little man reminds us of her dad.


Mine. I especially like my snowman. :)


These two of Lindsay's were particularly funny to me. That first one is supposed to be an angel! And I love the snowman's rosy cheeks and the expression on his face!

So yeah, there's the cookies.

It has also been snowy the last couple of days. I fooled around a bit with Windows Vista panoramic photo thing and got this messed up image:

But hey! It did the best it could do. It's not like my camera has a stable spot to sit to move from picture to picture smoothly.

I did something else the other day too. That time it made my closet doors look awesome!


Oh yeah and Peter stood on my finger tonight! For quite a long time too. It wasn't hard, millet spray bribing really does the trick. Oh and here's a picture of Peter! The lighting isn't great, I wish it would show his true color...

Peter peter pumpkin eater

Peter ate out of my hand for the first time today. I'm pretty excited. It's nice to see a new bird relax a bit and trust you enough to eat out of your hand. :)

Lindsay and Jennifer came over yesterday and we made sugar cookies. It was fun, and messy. I will try to remember to post a couple pictures here some time.

Pumpkin pie ice cream

DELICIOUS PUMPKIN PIE ICE CREAM!
Best brand, in my opinion, for this kind of ice cream? Oregon's own, UMPQUA! Sponsor me now, Umpqua.

What I've learned today:

• You should listen more than/as much as you speak.
• Girls interrupt each other while talking more than should be legal. Might be because there's hardly ever time, in a group, to get a word in... but sometimes it can be avoided. Sometimes your word you want in isn't very important when you think about it.
• This one coffee place I have always passed and never considered is actually great and well priced! Must go more often...
• They have free wi-fi too... I've never taken advantage of free wifi anywhere but at the library. I should do this some times... because it's cool. I could be one of those awesome people sitting with a coffee and a laptop acting like I'm doing important work. I'll actually just be on YouTube or Facebook or something but no one has to know if I sit in the corner. Knowing me, I would probably end up spilling on the keyboard and looking EVEN COOLER!
  
• There is one religion in particular that interests me and everytime I do deep down research and read about their actual stuff from ACTUAL CURRENT/FORMER MEMBERS, I can't stop! I don't mean it interests me as in I want to join them... I mean it interests me that people find ways to create these, well, cults and no one catches on to the obvious truths about them. All that money they are getting for converting people and creating new churches/temples/whatever should be used to feed hungry and SAVE HUMAN LIVES. Yes, actually help someone NOW instead of trying to save their/your life from something that happens after you are dead. Dead meaning something that no one has lived through to tell us about. SOMETHING UNCERTAIN AND UNKNOWN TO EVERYONE ALIVE. Sorry if I don't make sense with the way I am connecting my sentences. I am tired.
• I KNOW YOUR SECRETS.

So yeah. That's some of the stuff I learned/thought about today.
Oh and new video too.

Meet Gerald

Just one of our new friends.


That's all.

Picture blog.

^First time having canned cheese.

^Not us but we wished it was.

^After camping we went on a trolley tour. It was cool.

^So this girl Brandy commented my blog and I noticed she had a link so I went to it and it was her etsy so I bought stuff because it was cool.

^These came free with it and at first I thought she sent them on accident because I didn't see the thing that said that if you buy $10 or more in July than you get a pair of these awesome things (or others) for free. It was a cool surprise though!

Happy June

It's June now. Today is graduation day for the schools in my area. It's hard to believe it has been 2 years since graduating. It almost doesn't seem that long ago yet at the same time it seems longer. Weird. I'm so glad to be out of high school though. When I go to the mall or something and see how all the high school kids are NOW it's weird and creeps me out/makes me laugh. They all seem to have either embraced this "scene" phase or are just plain slutty. They also talk in this really annoying way that I don't remember too many people talking like when I was in school. It has only been 2 years so it's not like this is some crazy generation of kids.
Ok this leads me into this other thing. I am kind of scared of the future and how the future kids will be. I keep hearing about elementary school kids having sex and stuff like that... WTF? Of course I only hear people say that happens online but just the idea... It's just CRAZY! I mean, in elementary school all anyone I ever knew thought about was holding hands and possibly *gasp* kissing. And another thing is that I never heard anyone cuss when I was young. It was as though "butt" and "crap" were bad enough. Well now you pass a group of very young kids and they are using "ass" "fuck" "shit" etc. as part of their sentences. Is this just here??

ANYWHO.
Lindsay was over here last night and we watched Ghost World. It's weird how the cover for that would always pop out at me when I would go to rent movies yet I never bothered to even look at what it was about. But now that Lindsay works at a movie rental place she gets to watch these movies foo'!
So yeah, Ghost World. I thought it was pretty good. Especially since I'm drawn to movies with weird people. It wasn't so much the MAIN characters that were awesome to me but the ones with the smaller roles and even the movie extras just walking around in the background were awesomely weird.

That is all bye.

Charliiiiie

I posted TWO videos today. Both are from the same day. It was the day after Jen and Johnathan's wedding and it was with Lindsay and Amanda. I hadn't gotten around to editing them until today. See, that reminder yesterday actually WORKED! Whoaness!
So it was dark so they might be kind of hard to see but I DON'T CARE! I had fun.

Donutsssss

So here was my original post with pictures and all...
DONUTS

And here is how to make them...
http://www.dadcando.com/Making/AdvancedModels/PDFs/Homers_Doughnut_instructions_USL.pdf

It's a .pdf in case you couldn't figure that out so it might take a while to load for some of you.
I realized I never linked to that on the original post. Oops!

BTW, obviously the instructions have a much better looking donut. I couldn't quite get the hot glue thing to work because I have a small crafting hot glue gun.

Dollar store shades

Hello world. Well the wedding was here and is gone. Jennifer and Johnathan would now be in Disneyland for their honeymoon. Fun stuff.
I bought these sunglasses at the dollar store and think I am cool now. YES, I AM COOL NOW because I spent 1 dolla on eyeball protection. I'm Michael Jackson.
Oh and here are us bridesmaids in our dresses.

Now that all of that is over, it's kind of like a relief. It wasn't my wedding or anything but it was still a little stressful. Jen looked gorgeous and her mom was crying like crazy during the wedding.
The funny thing is, the next day I was hanging out with Lindsay and Amanda and for a second I thought, "Hmm, should we call Jen to see if she can hang out with us?" Haha then I remembered she would be on the road on the way to DL being all married and shit. :)

Bitter? Shmitter...

I have received a few comments from people saying I have gotten bitter.
Sure, I have changed in the last year or two but it's not that I've gotten bitter! I AM a happier person and I AM starting to realize more of who I am and what I want in life (credit for this does NOT go to YT, credit goes to growing up and falling in love, etc.)
Things have always bugged me and just because I mention them or complain about these things openly it doesn't mean I'm any angrier with the world than before. Maybe the world's perception of who BOWIECHICK really is is the thing that is changing. Maybe the world is seeing a little more Melody and a little less of the internet persona.
I am not going to feel bad about this because I know that it isn't me, it is just how these people are viewing me.

On another and perhaps a little more cheerful note:
AMANDA COMES TOMORROW! I am picking her up from the airport tomorrow and then later we are going to Jen's bachelorette party (hen night for those who would be less American than I). Don't worry, it won't be some drunk slutty night like the typical stupid ones you may or may not know of.
I am STILL confused about some details of this wedding. I will probably be confused through out the whole wedding, I'm sure. Oh well, I will just follow my fellow bridesmaids mindlessly and look pretty.
Our dresses aren't ugly, yay!

Lulz.

Ok so no lulz here, I just couldn't think of a title.
Jennifer and Johnathan's wedding is getting closer and closer. The bridal shower is tomorrow. I don't know if I told you guys I'm going to be a bridesmaid... well I am. I'm still confused about some details of the wedding and it's coming up pretty quick but I'm sure it will all be good. It's still hard to imagine them getting married! Our friend Amanda is coming for the wedding which is exciting. She was part of our little group but after high school she moved to New Mexico. Well she's coming for a few days and staying at my house, yay! She said she has lost a bunch of weight, I'm already jealous and I haven't even seen her yet. I need to lose fat.
I also need a job. I'm planning on just getting a seasonal type summer job because Isaac is planning on visiting for a month and I don't want to have to be working all the time when he's here. It would work out perfectly if I just got a summer one and he came afterwards. I don't know where, exactly. Well I have a place in mind...
Aaaand... that's just about it with my life. I think. Well kind of.
BTW, I hate cleaning bathrooms. :(

DONUTS

OH YEAH and I forgot to mention that Celsie was over here today and we made donuts! Ok, not real eatable ones but they almost look like it! We made them with plastic bags, tape, hot glue, and paint. Oh and some real sprinkles on top. I found out how to do it here.
I HAVE BEEN CRAVING DONUTS EVER SINCE!!
The hot glue gun thing didn't work out that well. I have a small one so we just got little strips of hot glue and that was hard to spread around at all.

Here are our results:






Speaking of Celsie...
Did you guys know she's engaged? Probably not! And pregnant! It's hard to believe, especially since I've known her for 10 years or so!