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Friday, May 9, 2008

Wannabe

I have chronic writer's block. I think I might have been born with it. It really does suck. In school we would be given an assignment to write a short essay or story about something. I would just sit there trying to think of something and.... the result was nothing. I would look around the room and notice that every other person would already have a page written and there I was with a blank page (well, minus the little doodles on the side). By the time I would get something written it would be late and not even any good. The thing is, this would be fine if I had NO interest in writing. The problem is... I do.
I remember when I was younger I would get out paper and just sit there trying to think of some epic story to write. I would end up putting away the blank paper and pencil soon after. And then for years I would write some stupid homemade "newsletter" for my friends. The thing this newsletter lacked was news. I recently found a couple of those old newsletters and most of the "articles" were me asking people to help me write stuff for it (which, btw, no one EVER did within my 3-4 years of trying this out).
Wannabe writer could be a term for what I am but I think that even "wannabe writers" write better than I do. I know I'm a wannabe artist though. I have all of the painting supplies and the interest in painting but when it comes to actually painting... it hardly ever works out with me. I must admit, some stuff isn't HORRIBLE, but I really am a little embarrassed. Maybe I'm just a critic.
What else am I a wannabe of? Well there is a musician or singer. I can NOT sing (seriously, just trust me on this one) so I am left with musician. But.. I seem to even have a problem tapping my foot to a beat. I have plenty of interest in music and even own a guitar (acoustic, Christmas present) and keyboard. I took piano lessons for a while and have a guitar learning book AND cd-rom. Plus my boyfriend is pretty much a guitarsexual so he could teach me if I let him. I guess I am just too unmotivated or something. Or too afraid to try because I rather not fail.
Actress is something to add to failed wannabes. I was really into the idea of acting when I was very young to about 15. I took two drama classes but was too shy and probably didn't have the talent. I never fit in with the drama group so I just gave up on that idea.
I really don't know what I'm going on about. I guess I just wish I could do so much but don't really have the drive to even try any of it. I suck.

3 comments:

homer simpson said...

Welcome to my world

Anonymous said...

I'm a professional writer. You have talent. Whether it grows will depend on you. Like any other skill, you need to practice. You also get better by turning away from yourself as the main topic and taking in the world. Here's 2 practice exercises.
(1) Interview an older person and then write a profile. People have amazing stories to tell.
(2) Study a place that means much to you, but describe it as it is, without adding in your feelings. What does the place present, on its own? How can you make it come alive for someone who will never visit it? --Da Prof

Jen said...

Just so you know, your one of the most talented people I've ever met. For example: I can't - for the life of me - find any films on any site that ppl have made for other artists music that are nearly as entertaining as yours. Also, no one I know has such a level head and yet the most strange and hillarious humour as you do. Remember when I was saying the other day, "... that it's usually the people who are a little different that end up surprising you... " I was talking specifically about you. You have talent. Trust me. You'll go far. Give it time.